Best Strategies for New Investors

So You Wanna Be an Investor, Huh? Let’s Talk Strategy (and Mistakes)

Alright, listen. If you’re anything like I was—wide-eyed, optimistic, maybe a little overconfident—you probably think investing is about picking a hot stock, sitting back, and letting your money multiply like rabbits on Red Bull.

Spoiler: it’s not.

I mean, I thought I was ready. I had just read a couple of bestsellers, watched one too many YouTube videos with guys in Lambos, and figured, “Hey, how hard can this be?”

Turns out, it can be real hard—especially if you don’t have a strategy.

But that’s what this post is all about. If you’re new to investing, first of all: welcome to the circus. 🎪 Second, I’m gonna walk you through the exact strategies I wish someone had slapped me with before I made my first deposit.

This isn’t some soulless listicle. This is me, a regular dude with a portfolio bruised from learning things the hard way, laying it all out for you like a friend over beers.

1. Start With the “Why” (Because If You Don’t Know, Wall Street Will Tell You)

Let’s get one thing straight: If you don’t know why you’re investing, you’re gonna fall for everyone else’s idea of what you should do.

I started because I wanted “financial freedom,” which sounded cool… but also, I had no real clue what it meant. Retirement? Early exit from the rat race? A yacht off Ibiza? 🤷‍♂️

Your strategy will completely change depending on your goals. Are you building long-term wealth for retirement? Trying to save for a down payment? Hoping to grow a side pot into something life-changing?

Define your “why.” Then back into the strategy from there. Otherwise, you’ll be swinging at every pitch like a rookie in the majors.

2. Keep Investments Boring—Because Boring Makes You Rich

Hot tip (pun fully intended): If it’s exciting, it’s probably not a good long-term investment.

My first year, I fell for a penny stock pitch from a guy I met in a crypto subreddit. 🤦‍♂️ That sucker doubled… then tanked faster than my post-holiday diet plan. I lost half my money in two weeks and still had the nerve to call myself an “investor.”

Here’s what works: index funds, ETFs, and dollar-cost averaging. I know, I know—it doesn’t feel like investing. It feels like watching paint dry. But that’s the point.

Real wealth comes from compounding. It’s not sexy. It’s not flashy. It’s just math. Warren Buffet once said, “It’s simple, but not easy.” He wasn’t kidding.  You can learn more at Turner Investments, that website is a wealth of information.

3. Time In the Market > Timing the Market

You ever try to time the bottom of a dip? Yeah, me too. You know what usually happens?

You wait… and wait… and then the stock shoots back up and you’re left sitting there like a chump with your “dry powder” and no gains. 🙃

Here’s the thing: the market is smarter than you, me, and that talking head on CNBC combined. Trying to outguess it is a fool’s errand. The best investors aren’t clairvoyants. They’re patient.

I started setting up automatic investments every two weeks. Rain or shine, up or down, the money hits my Vanguard account and gets put to work. It’s not sexy. But it builds wealth like compound interest is your personal butler.

4. Educate Yourself… but Filter the Noise

This one’s tricky. When you’re new, you want to learn. But holy hell, there’s a tsunami of opinions out there.

One day, you’ll see a TikTok saying “buy gold.” Next day, it’s “go all in on AI stocks.” By Friday, someone’s shouting about uranium.

Here’s what I do now: I pick three sources of financial info I trust. For me, that’s a weekly email from a reputable economist, one investing podcast, and a long-form newsletter that breaks down markets with data (not vibes).

You don’t need to know everything. You just need to know enough to avoid making emotional decisions based on some dude with a ring light and a Ferrari rental.

5. Diversify Like Your Wallet Depends on It (Because It Does)

I once had 70% of my portfolio in tech stocks. Guess when that was?

Right before the 2022 correction. 🫠

One bad quarter and I was sweating through my t-shirt like I ran a marathon. That was the wake-up call I needed.

Now? I spread things out: stocks, bonds, a bit of cash, some gold (yes, actual metal), and even a little real estate exposure through REITs. If one thing tanks, the others help balance it out.

Diversification isn’t just a buzzword—it’s your financial seatbelt.

6. Avoid FOMO Like It’s an Ex Texting at 2AM

Look, FOMO is real. Especially when your cousin’s friend’s barber just tripled his money on some coin you’ve never heard of.

But acting on FOMO is like eating gas station sushi—it might work out… but is it worth the risk?

When something is exploding in value, it’s already too late. Stick to your strategy. Remember: you don’t have to get rich today. You just have to avoid getting wrecked tomorrow.

7. Mindset Is 90% of the Game

This one hit me later than I’d like to admit.

I used to check my brokerage account five times a day. Every red tick made my stomach flip. Every green one gave me a dopamine hit.

That’s not investing. That’s gambling dressed in a button-down shirt.

Real investors zoom out. They think in years, not days. You’ve got to detach a bit. Treat it like tending a garden—not spinning a roulette wheel.

If you can master your emotions (and yeah, it takes practice), you’re already ahead of most.

Final Thoughts: It’s a Marathon, Not a Meme Stock

If I could go back and talk to my past self—the guy who thought Tesla was going to $10,000 and that NFTs were the new retirement plan—I’d probably smack him with a book on dividend stocks and a Roth IRA.

Investing isn’t about thrills. It’s about building something slow, steady, and meaningful. Like stacking bricks into a fortress. Brick by brick, week by week.

And if you mess up? Don’t sweat it. We all mess up. The key is learning from it, laughing when you can, and staying in the game long enough to let time do its thing.

So whether you’re opening your first account or staring at your fifth spreadsheet of the day—remember: keep it simple, stay focused, and don’t let the noise get in your head.

Now go plant those seeds. 🌱

Key Takeaways:

• 🎯 Know your “why” before you invest—strategy starts with purpose.

• 💤 Boring = good when it comes to long-term investing.

• ⏳ Time in the market beats timing it—consistency is key.

• 🧠 Educate yourself, but limit your info sources to avoid analysis paralysis.

• 💼 Diversify to protect your future—don’t bet it all on one horse.

• 🚫 Ignore FOMO—you’re not late, you’re just early to your plan.

• 🧘‍♂️ Work on your mindset—investing is mental as much as financial.

What About You?

If you’re just starting out, I’d love to hear your goals, fears, or the dumbest investment advice someone’s thrown your way. (I once got told to “invest in alpacas.” Still not sure if they were joking.)

Drop a comment below or shoot me a message—let’s learn from each other. 👊

And hey, if this helped even a little, do yourself a favor and share it with someone else who’s ready to stop guessing and start growing.

Catch you in the markets. 📈